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Exploring the feeling of Love

Source: KCR College Radio
Hello people

In this blog, we will talk about the most famous and talked-about emotion: Love. It is universal like pain, meaning that most animal species experience it (though for species other than primates, love tends to act as a motivator for sexual and parenting behavior). But in primates, and especially Homo sapiens (i.e., us), the concept of love gets very complicated since our cognitive ability helps us experience love in various realms. For example, you may love your mother, your sister, your best friend, your favorite burger, or even yourself, but you love each of them in different ways. So, let's try to understand this emotion from various domains.


Evolutionary standpoint:

This standpoint attempts to explain the basis of love which applies to all the species. If you have heard of the term 'evolution,' you probably would have heard of the most prominent theory in this domain: the 'Theory of natural selection' proposed by Charles Darwin. An apt explanation of this theory is given by this famous phrase: 'Survival of the fittest.'


According to the above theory, animals reproduce to pass on their genes to the next generation, and a mutation (i.e., change) may occur every once a while in the structure of the gene. If that change helps a species in their survival, they will outlive other animals of the species and hence will be able to pass on these mutated genes to future generations, making that change permanent.


So, any species' survival requires two most important activities: procreation (reproduction) and cooperation (kinship and altruism). Love acts as one of the biggest and strongest motivators for both activities. In the realm of procreation, love promotes sexual behavior, which enhances procreation. And in the realm of cooperation, love helps you form a bond with your relatives and your group, which is very important for survival in the wild (In fact, this is one of the reasons behind the rise of our species from the middle of the food chain to the top of it).


Biological standpoint:

From a biological perspective, love is just a mammalian drive, much like hunger or thirst. Biologically, there are three stages of love, namely- lust, attraction, and attachment.


Lust refers to the initial sexual desire or drive. It gives that initial motivation or the 'want' to pursue your potential mate. This stage may last from few weeks to months.

Attraction refers to a romantic desire towards a specific individual. It stems out of lust when a commitment with the partner is formed. This stage may last from one-and-half to three years.

The final stage is attachment, where bonding is formed with the partner, which may last for years or even decades. This bonding often involves (or is reinforced by) things like marriage and children or even shared interests.


When it comes to parental love, parents' love for their children stems from the protection and care a child requires. This love majorly affects the growth and development of the child. 

The child's love for the parent is mainly driven by basic wants like food, warmth, and comfort. 


Love for other things like friends or food acts more like a drive to make you want it more. All of these forms of love are linked to hormones being released in the brain that promote one's happiness and well-being.


Psychological standpoint:

Psychology has come up with many theories trying to explain why and how we feel/express love.


One of the prominent ones is the triangular theory of love proposed by psychologist Robert Sternberg. According to him, love constitutes three different components: intimacy, passion, and commitment. 

Intimacy refers to the feeling of closeness and connectedness between the people involved. This is what provides the feeling of warmth in the relationship.

Passion refers to the drive that leads to romantic, sexual, and loving behavior.

Commitment refers to the commitment to love a certain other and maintain that love.


Psychologist Eric Fromm emphasized the importance of the actions involved in love. He maintained that love is ultimately not a feeling in itself; instead, it is a product of loving actions and commitment over a duration of time.


Conclusion:


Though we tried explaining the basis of love from various viewpoints, love is too complex an emotion to be described in a few words. What we can say for sure is love is vital for the survival of a species. From parental love to love for an activity, it is an emotion that helps sustain various aspects of our life.



Written and Edited by: Yash Jayesh Doshi

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