The Games We Play

Hello readers!

I hope you are doing well. Today we will be discussing the games we play in life. I guarantee that by the end of this blog, you will have gained a new perspective on life as a whole. So let’s get started.

Introduction

What do I mean by games here? I don’t mean those mobile or pc games, nor do I mean those mind games cheating partners play on each other. Here, by games, I mean any activity that we do to keep ourselves engaged in this world, or else we would all go insane.

So, what type of activities are we talking about here? You wouldn’t read a blog explaining daily activities like brushing or bathing, would you? Here, I am referring to more complex activities like exercising, doing a job, maintaining a relationship, etc.

Understanding context

To help you get on the same frequency as I, let's go through a few examples to understand the topic better.

Consider the classic life cycle told by our parents. Get good grades, go to a good college, then a good job, which would then better your chances of finding a suitable life partner with whom you would procreate more copies of your genes (reproduction), raise them to be good individuals in society, and lastly, be of service to God and community. What is the common dogma lying behind each step of this life cycle? At every point, you are engaged in some sort of game. From being a student to being a parent, you are constantly involved in an activity that has some level of responsibility attached to it. Also, the game has to be structured such that it looks meaningful and, if done well, yields an appropriate reward, making the game worth your effort.

But there comes a time wherein your step back and wonder, “Why am I playing these games?”

The answer lies in the negation of the question above. What would you do if not for this? These games give you a sense of importance to your existence. And this feeling of purposefulness is what makes living in this world worthwhile. 

I recently came across an interesting theory that sums up the purpose of games. So, imagine that all homo sapiens are transported to a planet similar to Earth. But what’s different is that this world, let’s call it Merth, doesn’t have any suffering. Everyone has more than enough access to food, clothing, and other necessities. Everybody gets what they want by just pressing a button on their chairs. Everyone has loyal and trustworthy relationships with other humans. So, what would happen to this world? Is it the ideal world that we all dream of? Or is there a twist?

The theory suggests that if our world is void of suffering, we will try to destroy everything around us just so that something unusual happens.

We usually think that our lives would be much better if we were to be free of all the pain and suffering the world has to offer. But, our mind doesn’t work that linearly. We humans need to keep playing some sort of game to have a stable life. It's kind of a necessity for a healthy body and mind.

You may say, “Why would one choose pain and hard work? I never feel like going to my job or hitting the gym. I always long for a break from all these sufferings. Then why would that same suffering be a necessity for my mind?” I get you. But read along, and you might gain more clarity on the topic.

The ant and the grasshopper

Let’s better analyze the topic through an age-old fable.

We have all heard the story of the ant and the grasshopper. Imagine you are the ant, and it's summer. All around you, you see grasshoppers enjoying the summer season. You look on your right, and you see millennial grasshoppers partying to rock music in their #YOLO t-shirts. You then look to your left, and you see a bunch of grasshopper tourists who came from a nearby jungle to enjoy the exotic summer vibe in your jungle. You then think to yourself, “Maaaaannn! Look at all these grasshoppers having the best time of their lives, not a care in the world! I want to join them and have fun too because who doesn’t want that. What should I do?”

But then comes the winter, and now you realize that if you had partied with the grasshoppers, you would suffer and probably die in the cold like most grasshoppers out there. Hence, the fable teaches you to choose hard work over short-term hedonic happiness.

Now, let’s think of an alternate ending to this story.

What if you never lived until the winter?  What if there came a forest fire and killed all the insects? You died before you could reap the benefits of your hard work. Would you still believe that hard work is the best path to choose? Or would you regret not enjoying with the grasshoppers when you had the opportunity to do so?

You see, that’s the pothole in hard work. Yes, you get a reward, but you won’t get it right now. Yes, you will get the worth of your hard work, but you don’t know when. But one thing is for sure, by choosing hard work over immediate pleasure, you choose a long-lasting eudaemonic feeling of satisfaction and joy over a short-lived hedonic feeling of happiness.

Let’s understand the last part with a different example. Consider an activity like finding the perfect life partner. There are over three billion potential life partners out there. The task seems humongous. So, do you not give it a try? Obviously not. But why? Because the satisfaction when you finally find a suitable life partner will outweigh all the struggles you went through finding that right person.

The journey is more fruitful than the destination

Think about when you planned to go for a workout. When you think about it a day before, you envision yourself transforming into Arnold Schwarzenegger in a few minutes and get instantly motivated. But the next day, as soon as you are about to start your workout, your laziness wakes up and says, “Aah, I don’t feel like doing this! Can’t we chill instead?”. Your mind at this point would give you a hundred reasons why you shouldn’t work out. After all, who wants to leave their comfortable, cozy couch and get tired and sweat like a horse.

But something magical happens when you get past that initial resistance and start working out. That evil buddy just vanishes. The same mind that gave you a hundred excuses now tells you, “Yeah, man; we did it! Let’s do a few more reps”. And when you have completed the workout, the feeling of accomplishment is just on another level. 

So, how did your mind take that 180 degrees turn? This is the purpose of games and hard work we don’t realize. Hard work doesn’t only provide a purpose in life or long-term satisfaction; it makes you believe and stay on course in the process as well. 

Yes, working out for a year or so would yield a healthy and better-looking body; we all know that. But let's say even after putting in all the hard work, you don’t get the desired body shape. Does that mean your hard work was all in vain? NOT AT ALL! What you don’t realize is that even though you didn’t achieve that desired end goal, you learned a lot in the process. Not only are you better off than you started, but you also grew your confidence and determination by committing to a game and playing it diligently every single day. Moreover, the failure built your resilience which is an advantageous trait to have in crises.

Closing Remarks

I hope that the necessity of these games in our lives is apparent by now. But, choosing the right games is equally important. Don't play the game of grinding every day in a dead-end job that doesn't provide growth. Don't put your efforts into building and sustaining a toxic relationship.
Not all the games out there are worth playing. We need to make the most of the limited time we have on this planet. Hence, make sure you choose the right games and play them to the best of your ability!

Written and Edited by: Yash Jayesh Doshi